


o vampire! my vampire!

by gemofmine (Unsaid)



Series: la chaconne [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Jeno-centric, M/M, Vampire AU, beware the angst, one-sided noren, past nohyuck, repost, slightly aged up like 2 or 3 years
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-11
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2019-04-22 09:58:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14306241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Unsaid/pseuds/gemofmine
Summary: Jeno's journey through immortal life ebbs and flows through the streets of different cities on different times, and of the people he befriends and falls in love with along the way.





	o vampire! my vampire!

**Author's Note:**

> raise your hand if you had a phase with the vampire chronicles once!! this fic was inspired specifically by jeno's go teasers but it's not a coincidence that all the members look like they were put straight out of go.
> 
> i want to thank my queen majo for helping me during the whole process and even writing some parts of this fic, i put that reference just for u yk!! zee for hyping me all this time and also rei my wonderful beta reader!!!  
> ily all!!

_December, 1915. England._

In the mournful nights, the shadows prowled the streets and the deadly silence was their companion. It was one of those nights, where the cold winter was present and the anxieties and restlessness stalked anyone who crossed. Within the haze the shadows of Jeno and Doyoung danced alone.

They were on their way to the shelter, a place they didn’t need but still had decided to look for. The headlights passed and its light was not as bright as Jeno's skin, his red eyes contemplated the destination to which they were heading.

Doyoung, his guardian, walked with hurried steps, a look of uneasiness reflected on his face. They both knew that the bombs could come at any time. Arriving the shelter, a three-story house in the middle of ruins of what was a family neighborhood, they didn’t go to the front door. Instead, they headed to the patio and moved to the hidden door of the basement. Doyoung expertly knocked on the door with the code they had learned and quickly Taeyong's face appeared, with an expression of relief and worry.

“News arrives overseas.” Doyoung announced dryly, neither happiness nor bitterness in his tone.

Both entered through the door and directed their steps toward the living room. Groups of children and young people filled the house. While Doyoung engages in a conversation with Taeyong. Jeno heard a lightly cry of someone not so far from him. It was from a child less than seven years old; he was on the floor with his hands hiding his face. He was trying to suppress his sobs, and next to him, Mark, a young man of about nineteen years, was trying to comfort him.

Jeno stood, petrified, as he admired the scene. He heard each of the phrases of encouragement that Mark gave the child who just had lost his parents, caressing his back and giving him small pats, the child nodded letting out a few sobs, such a little demonstration of pure affection that leaves Jeno breathless. Only once in a lifetime could one of these be witnessed. Or in Jeno’s case, lives.

Once the boy had smiled and taken one of the toys that Mark had offered him, he got up and noticed Jeno's gaze on him. Jeno offered him one of his warm smiles.

“How was the world outside?” Mark asked lightly.

“There are many rumors. Nobody knows if the war has subsided or if it’s just beginning.” Jeno commented with discouragement.

Both young men walked to the dining room table near the radio.

“I doubt that is the case. The Germans have other plans, they're getting more and more support.”

Mark took the radio and began to change the channels carefully. Other children joined them. Mark put the channel that the allies clandestinely tuned to communicate news. From the emission came a voice so choked by the static, it needed many attention to decipher the words. Mark's eyes were fixed on a point and Jeno couldn’t help but stare his face.

The first time he met Mark, he had recently lost his parents. He remembered his sad and melancholic eyes. A total loss of innocence, Jeno would say. Not long after their first meeting, Mark had confessed to him that he wanted to join the army. Jeno didn’t feel any anger or bitterness in his words, but a sincere desire to stop suffering, like his. Jeno would say that Mark was too good for this world.  

Doyoung knew Taeyong from a long time ago and since his guardian knew him, Jeno soon joined the circle of friends of the caretaker in the shelter. Obviously, neither of them knew about their condition. Mark was a close friend of Taeyong, who after the incident, was the only family left for Mark. Jeno and Doyoung decided to join the service of the foster home as a gesture of good faith, and since apart from other young adults in charge, there were only small children in the house, no one questioned their strange habits or their peculiar schedules.

Vampiric life didn’t change Jeno so much, many years had passed and the only thing that kept him sane was the people around him. He missed the sun and wished cats didn’t have him a despicable mortal fear anymore.

The station is interrupted and all the children looked expectantly at Mark, who had become like an older brother for all of them.

“They didn’t say anything about the German troops.” Mark said thoughtfully.

A boy shouted something about the bombs and other children responded in fear. The little ones started to cry. Mark quickly settled and tried to calm the crowd of children in panic, with great patience he said:

“The bombs won’t come, I promise. Even if it's just up to me to stop them.” And by that not only Jeno was stunned by the words.

Three days passed. Jeno was reading a book in the middle of the kitchen with just a candle illuminating the room. The small children were already sleeping, Doyoung had gone out on one of his night walks and Taeyong was resting from another exhausting day. The house was sunk in a comfortable silence, the hearth casted the last sparks after the fire had been appeased. The silence was interrupted by a few steps down the main stairs. The footsteps continued to the hallway that lead to the kitchen, and a figure opened the door with the greatest delicacy so as to not make any noise. Mark was face to face with Jeno who was just beginning to bite an apple.

Surprised, Mark took a step back. He was somewhat embarrassed.

“I thought you would be sleeping.” Mark commented.

“I suffer from insomnia.” The lie he had said so many times already.

Jeno noticed the bust wrapped in a cloth that he had on one arm and arched one eyebrow. “Where are you going?”

Mark didn’t know how to lie. Jeno had realized this a few days after meeting him. He was one of those people who, no matter the situation, would always tell the truth and now Jeno noticed that Mark was struggling trying to come up with a lie but failed and left out a sigh.

“I’m going to enlist.” He said decisively. With a tone as if Jeno tried to stop him he was not going to change his mind. “Don’t try to stop me.”  

Jeno took another bite of the apple. “You seem very determined, are you sure you want to do it? What about Taeyong?”

Taeyong's name took Mark by surprise, his hard facade fell and a new one of confusion and guilt showed up.

“I've thought about it enough. He'll understand. I wrote him a letter. This is my decision.”

Jeno pondered over the words for a while and nodded, waiting for Mark to notice his expression of sadness upon hearing the news. He didn’t wish Mark's death, not so early. He imagined him married with a big family, a daughter maybe two, a beautiful wife, a job that he loves and a life that was prosperous and happy. He didn’t want him to go through the horrors of war, to see people die and lose companions, to witness the pain and find the most horrible of humanity. Jeno would know, he was a child of war after all.

“Okay, it's your decision, I won’t tell anyone I saw you." Jeno expressed.

“Thanks, Jeno."

Mark stepped toward him, his lips chapped from the winter winds and even when Mark hesitated Jeno approached and gave him a hug. Jeno noticed that Mark was shaking, he couldn’t see him but he felt him on the verge of tears. Jeno hardened his grip and held Mark firmly hoping he could transmit him strength and endurance. _This will be a goodbye forever_ , Jeno thought. Another one to the list.  

December ended, the war was at its peak. Jeno was checking onto one of his old and worn jackets while he was preparing the bags for his departure. He found a little note inside the pocket, it was wrinkled and it looked like it had been there for some time, imprinted inside with an odd calligraphy:

_I hope to see you again, my friend. - August._

-

_April, 1922. Paris._

Spring had arrived in Paris. Flowers were flooding the streets, with hundreds of colors and fragrances, each of which Jeno could distinguish. The trees bore fruits and their shades of green ranged from the lightest to the darkest. Spring in Paris was truly the most beautiful sight Jeno had seen in many years. Although he longed for not being able to admire it during the day, sometimes when it was sufficiently cloudy he could take a small peek out of his window. Yet the city of lights didn’t disappoint anyone at night.

That same year he met Renjun, and it was like love at first sight. He was the son of a singer in a famous nightclub and his father was no less than the pianist. The club was close to where Jeno lived at that time. Normally his youthful and innocent appearance didn’t fool anyone, but given the fact that Renjun shared the same physical age of Jeno, it changed things.

Sometimes he would find him at the piano with his father or in a corner of the stage watching his mother sing and Jeno would normally come to him and share a night together waiting for the show to end, adding that Renjun's parents were delighted with Jeno. They were the most unpredictable artists that Jeno had ever known, something that Renjun had inherited as well, since he wrote poetry and made paintings inspired by Van Gogh and Monet. Renjun would normally tell Jeno about this book he read about forbidden star-crossed lovers and Jeno would buy it right after.

That night at the club there was a lively melody accompanied by the energetic voice of Renjun's mother. Jeno was sitting on one of the chairs watching the stage. Renjun joined her from time to time to accompany her in the choir; they both danced naturally and Jeno was hypnotized by the soft and delicate movements that Renjun made when dancing. The final verse of the song ended with a high note. Renjun took one step forward to grab a glass of champagne in the counter bar and drank it in one gulp, he slammed the glass on the shelf and took the microphone offered by his mother, finishing the song with an incredible high note that left everyone astonished.

A electrified and breathless Renjun approached Jeno and rested one arm on his shoulders. Jeno let out one of his noisiest laughs.

“Jeno! Old sport!” Renjun shouted. “Did you hear that Picasso is in Paris? Do you want to go and meet him?”

Jeno's smile reached his eyes. “I would love that.” Renjun exclaims in excitement.

It was a little over midnight when the show was over and a crowd of people with the bustle of alcohol filled the air. Renjun's father approached them.

“Young adults! Would you like to go for something to eat?” He asked, and they both nodded.  

They ended up at another bar and ordered a few appetizers right over other glasses of wine. They only finished when it was already one in the morning. Renjun's parents had gone home to rest, while the two young men were taking a walk through the night city of Paris.

“You have a beautiful voice.” Jeno commented, a soft blush on his cheeks.

“And you have a beautiful face.” Renjun let out a chuckle.

Jeno was probably in love.

After spending almost three months with Renjun, visiting him in the bar, contemplating the nightlife together, reading his favorite books, keeping him company at his parent's apartment while he painted or wrote poetry, Renjun disappeared from Jeno’s life. He looked for him at the bar but he wasn’t there. His parents said he had started studying at a university and he didn’t have time to hang around at the bar anymore. Jeno felt desolate that Renjun hadn’t showed up to explain him why his sudden disappearance.

On a cloudy day, a little after sunset Jeno found Renjun sitting in one of the chairs of a park, dressed elegantly, reading a book with a pencil behind his ear. Next to him was a blonde with curls, well-dressed in a sky blue dress. Jeno approached them. Before he even made a noise, Renjun had already recognized him.

“Jeno! Old sport!” He announced. The blonde girl raised her head and let out a surprised sort of a noise. Jeno was used to that kind of reaction when people saw him.

“It seems like it's been years since we've seen each other, Renjun.” Jeno commented with a tone of disappointment.

“Oh yeah. I'm sorry, I've been busy. Look, she's Clara.” He addressed the girl. “My study partner, I've started college, you know that?” Jeno nodded.

Jeno didn’t understand. He was there in front of Renjun but he looked like another person. It was as if everything that they had created, the connection, the friendship, had been lost and Jeno didn’t know how and why it had happened.

He didn’t remember what he did next, but somehow he had ended up in his apartment again, with the blinds low and in total darkness. Little by little Jeno began to understand the type of person Renjun was.

After their meeting, Renjun returned to frequent the bar and this time Jeno saw again the minimum glimpse of the light that irradiated Renjun.

Renjun filled himself with new experiences, art and fanaticism. If there was something that bored him to the core now, it was repetitive and monotonous people. He needed to be stimulated or else he would leave what he was doing, or _who_. Jeno was worried about the possibility of being abandoned, again.

Jeno sat alone at the bar staring absently into his glass. The barman would pinch his shoulder and say, "He'll come. He's late because of the rain. Poor lad he must be dripping wet," and Jeno would smile into his vodka believing every word of it.

And then Renjun arrived, impeccable. Not a drop of water on his suit, on his hair, on his face. Instead of wet, he looked radiant.

A genuine smile never left his face as he walked towards Jeno.

“I know I'm late.”

“It's fine.”

Renjun sat next to him and looked at him in the eyes and smiled wider as if he knew the effect he had on him.

“So! It's official!”

“What's official?"

“With Clara. It's... Isn't it perfect?”

Jeno smiled politely at his friend's happiness. “Yes,” He said slowly. “Yes, it is”

And then as if they were synchronized —and they probably were— Clara arrived at the Bar and planted a soft kiss on Renjun’s lips and sat next to Jeno. She had known about Jeno's feelings for Renjun and she did this anyway. When Renjun got distracted, chatting with the barman.

Jeno looked at Clara and whispered, “You knew, and you're not sorry.” And she smiled sadly at him rubbing circles in his hands with her pale finger.

“I am sorry that I am not sorry.”

The news came one afternoon at six in the afternoon. Renjun would move to the United States. He told the news with a tone of joy and emotion, he would travel to the New World to study arts and cinema. Jeno pretended that his world didn’t fall apart when he told him that his traveling companion would be Clara.

“I'll always be available, you know.” And as he said it he realized that he meant it: _If what you have with… If America doesn't work, I'll still be here._

And Renjun looked at him with such tenderness as he said, “I know you will.” Jeno realized he not only meant it too, but he knew what Jeno felt for him. And something in the way Renjun caressed his hair made him notice that he wasn't corresponded. Renjun let out a sigh and got up from his seat, made a gesture of farewell with his head and approached the bar's exit.

Jeno's heart broke into pieces with the soft sound of the door closing.

-

_August, 1957. England._

Donghyuck hid from the sun. He roamed through dark subway stations with his brown hair dyed gold. He wore a leather jacket with the words _Dark Sun_ engraved on it. He was beautiful as he was bitter, but Jeno called him _summer_ when he smiled, because he was young and his hands were warm. His presence was dazzling as if you were blinded the sun and his laughter sounded like a song.

Jeno loved Donghyuck, but he was not in love with him, and Donghyuck looked at him as if he wanted to burn him. Jeno was night and darkness, while Donghyuck was fire and danger. And although they knew that they were not made for each other, they matched. They ran in the dark until their feet hurt and their legs collapsed, Donghyuck telling him that the world was made for him and Jeno believing him. He had never met a person so captivating and beautiful. He didn't even need the vampiresque masquerade to look ethereal.

Donghyuck was an orphan, as was Mark. Jeno couldn’t help but compare his two friends and how different they were from each other. Jeno had the thought that maybe they could had been good friends if they were born at the same time. They had England and their dead parents in common. Jeno thought a lot about the concept of soulmates; _What happens if your soulmate has died many decades ago?_ _You would never have the opportunity to meet them, and you would be incomplete all your life_. He hated that thought. Jeno used to think that Renjun and he were soulmates, but he was already gone.

They spent their free time in the neighborhood with a red Cadillac that belonged to one of the boys. Donghyuck put on the radio the hits of the moment and sang in tune with them. Before meeting Jeno, Donghyuck had other friends, with leather jackets that identified them. They surrounded the city at night with their splendid cars, stole liquors and went into fight bars. Jeno knew that they weren’t the best company, but Donghyuck was a heavenly creature with a dark agenda.

“Jeno, your face… What would you do if I punched you in the face with my fist?” Donghyuck commented one day, a night where they were sitting in the hood of the Cadillac, one of the boys doing it with a redhead in the back of the car.

Jeno let out a laugh. “You wouldn't dare.”

Donghyuck raised his arm and directed his fist to his face quickly but stopped just right when it was inches from his nose, Jeno didn't even blink. Donghyuck stretched his fingers and crawled one through Jeno's throat, if Jeno could, he would have had chills. The other boys a few meters away from them were finishing a bottle of Whiskey.

"I would kill for your face," explained Donghyuck. And Jeno remembered with melancholy the comment Renjun had made once about his face.

"I think you got it wrong." Jeno caressed Donghyuck's cheek with his knuckles, Donghyuck sunk into the contact and closed his eyes. The redhead came out of the back seat with her face as red as her hair.

The following nights, Jeno stayed in Donghyuck's apartment, along with Ten and Yuta, members of the gang. Yuta's jacket had engraved _Son of Japan_ while Ten's had _Perfect 10._

The apartment was small and messy; syringes, bottles and underwear all trashed on the floor. The beds were four mattresses in one corner and the kitchen was filled with dirty dishes, but Jeno couldn’t deny that his days there were the most fun he ever had. Each night they drank, Ten was the one who always fell first, while Yuta had the highest tolerance. There were days when some others members joined, Johnny and Jaehyun, known as _Chicago Lover_ and _Sweetest Boy._

One night at the moonlight, they were all gathered outside a gas station. For a few hours it was quiet until one of the rival gangs approached in with their vehicle. They got out of the car and strutted while Donghyuck and the others were watching them with blood boiling, until Yuta interrupted.

“How many times do we have to tell you that this is our area? Or are you too stupid to pick it up?” Yuta let out.

“Ha! You once again believing you’re the owners of this place, you don’t own anything.” The other erupted.

What happened next was an intense and exalted fist fight with all against all. Jeno was forced to participate, Donghyuck was hit in the face, his nose dripping with blood, Yuta took a metal bar from the floor and made a comeback against one of the rivals. This caused one scream of pain from the rival and the blood that emanated from the bruise splashed Donghyuck’s shirt. Then, Jeno took him away with worry, but seeing that the man was still alive, they continued with the fight until the police arrived. But they managed to escape.

The next time they weren’t so lucky. The gang didn’t have money to spend the night wasted and they planned to steal a few bottles and food in a place near the gas station, as they had done it many times before. Donghyuck left the car and went in to inspect the store, followed by Jaehyun and Ten. Jeno and the others waited in the car outside, then Yuta came in and threatened the manager with a fake gun he had bought at a sex toy store. Jaehyun grabbed the sweets while Ten took the bottles and Donghyuck scanned the street. But shortly before completing the robbery, the police sirens sounded so close that they couldn’t even run, and the cops got out of the car and arrested everyone, but it was not the first or last time Donghyuck got arrested. They spent several nights behind the bars, Donghyuck sleeping against Jeno's shoulder. When they set them free, Yuta took the highest charges and was forced to do community service, the others managed to leave with conditional freedom. When they were far enough from the commissary Donghyuck let loose one of his loudest and mocking laughters.

“Jeno, the world is mine.” He whispered in his ear.

Donghyuck crushed on Jeno and Jeno could almost correspond him. One night, while sitting at the same place on the hood of the car, Jeno contemplated the skyline before the sunrise while Donghyuck stole glances at him from time to time. _The sun is ashamed to rise and be in love with a vampire._  

“Donghyuck, do you think you have met your soulmate already?” Jeno asked sadly.

Donghyuck was perplexed thinking about the question. “Are you trying to say that we are soulmates?” He looked at him incredulously, Jeno let out a giggle.

“No. Do you believe that?” He asked seriously.

“Do I look like an idiot who believes in that kind of romantic garbage?”

Donghyuck said mockingly. But even so, he leaned forward, his eyes fixed on Jeno's lips, slowly approaching. Jeno let himself go, closed his eyes and let Donghyuck kiss him. Either way, it wasn’t going to be their last kiss, but Jeno knew that there was going to be an end for them someday close. There would be many more days of Donghyuck begging him to stay and many more years of Jeno trying to forgive himself.

-

_November, 1988. Germany._

“Freiheit für alle!”

 _Freedom for all_. It was the first thing Jeno heard from Jisung, a sixteen-year-old boy —who sometimes looked older— when he finished a graffiti he had made on the wall and ran off with a group of teenagers. Jisung wore black leather boots with hoops and barbs accessories, had several piercings in his ears, wore a light black eyeliner over his eyes and his shirts were always from underground punk bands.

Jisung hadn't been dotted with the talent of art, yet he managed to create the most impressive graffiti that Jeno had seen, that led him to a clandestine fame among punk fans at the time. Jeno saw his creations and it reminded him of the already immortalized Picasso and how Renjun had once admired so many of his works that he had taken Jeno to see them. Jisung's group was filled with total misfits, the obsessed, drug addicts and some even criminals but they all had something in common: art and punk. Jisung had grown up without a father and with a overworking mother who only saw him during late hours of the night. But even so Jisung was not lacking in love; he was just a little rebellious and creative. _Too much,_ Jeno would say.

One day Jisung brought Jeno to an abandoned warehouse where he would introduce the band he was so fond of. It was no surprise that the broken-down building was being used as a place of practice given that it helped in acoustics due to the large and unkempt walls that produced natural sound and didn’t leave a dent to their wallets.

When Yukhei first saw him, he said; “Oh, wow, dude. You look like a vampire.” To which Jeno laughed very loud.

“Thanks, I guess.”

The members of the newcoming punk band were Yukhei, an imposing tall boy with a Greek God face who was in charge of the guitar; Taeil, the mysterious one who played the drums, never spoke much and kept a calm visage on stage; and Jungwoo, the flirt with a captivating voice and hypnotizing glint in his eyes that drew in the audience further.

They were occupied by trying catchy phrases for the band name while Jisung tried to draw graffitis that came to his mind.

“Guys, I got it! Edible Glue!” Yukhei exclaimed, satisfied.

Everyone in the room looked at him in disbelief. Jisung rolled his eyes so hard that they turned white and Jungwoo let out a hopeless sigh. Taeil was still in the background going over some lyrics and quietly thinking.

“Fortunata is the best one so far.” Jungwoo said, giving it because it was his idea he was fond of the name.

“What are we? A Heavy Metal Band? No!” Yukhei said. “That name can’t be, it was to be something ugly.”

They remained silent, Jungwoo a little bit light-headed.

“Eureka!” Taeil screamed. “Guys, we’re three, right? And you all are taller than me so there is just me as the short one, and it was to be ugly so, Ugly Runt.”

“Bro! That’s sick!” Yukhei said.

“Yeah, it’s cool.” Jisung added from the back. “It fits.”

“Jungwoo?” Taeil asked.

Jungwoo looked at him with a doubt but in the end, he gave in and nodded. They all cheered up with screams, Yukhei with the loudest ones.

Some time later, when the name of the band was settled and the demo was finished, Ugly Runt’s album would be called _Vampires in The Cold War,_  neither more nor less inspired by Jeno’s looks and his somewhat tips for the lyrics for the songs. Jisung had created a fascinating poster with the name of the band inscribed in a particular type of graffiti that looked like vampire fangs. Their first touch came a few days later and they gained a small popularity for their penetrating sounds mixed with Jungwoo’s angelic voice.

 _Eternity and death have their similarities_ , Jeno thought. Both have an end, and although with death you can't decide when life ends with your loved ones, in eternity you have the privilege, or rather the condemn, of being able to choose when you want die for others. Jeno had to leave Donghyuck without explanations, leave to not extend more their pain, it was selfish yes, and it something he would never forgive himself of. Renjun left him and Jeno never got over him. And Mark was gone, in what even these days, Jeno still regrets not stopping him; he never knew what happened to him, if he’d died in the war or returned back home. In immortality you get to carry all these thoughts for infinity and Jeno’s intention was to take them in the most special and cheerful way he could. He wanted to immortalize his friends in his memory; he didn’t want to see them suffering, finding out he was a vampire, an evil and lonely creature that never died and never saw the sun.

Until he told Jisung.

In winter, the sunset was almost past five o'clock in the afternoon. Jisung stayed late waiting for his mother to come from work in the days she could pick him up. After all, he was a mama’s boy and he wouldn’t lose an opportunity to spend time with her. That's how he met Jisung, in the neglected school where he worked as an assistant of a history teacher.

Sitting on the floor in a corner drawing scribbles that looked from a six-year-old child but impressive graffitis in the following pages is where he found Jisung the first time.

Jeno had never cried so much until the day he told him, his throat ended up scratchy and his eyes were as red as his irises, his voice was hoarse when he was speaking and every time he told another anecdote, an ugly sob came out. Jisung remained silent, listening carefully, without any questions.

“Jeno…” He said. “I'm not capable of knowing what to tell you but I'm sorry you feel so sad.”

Jeno nodded, and suppressed another sob. “Jisung, my friend. Thank you. I just needed someone to listen.”

“Does this mean I’ll never see you again?” Jisung looked hurt.

“I… don’t know. I mean, you already know my secret.”

“Please don’t leave yet, my days are less lonely with you. Wait until the band makes their last play.” Jisung begged him.

And Jeno accepted with an soft smile.

When Jeno left, Jisung handed him a poster with a the words _O Vampir! Mein Vampir!_ written on it in a delicate but yet beautiful graffiti of flowers covered in blood. Years after his departure from Germany, Jeno discovered that Ugly Runt became famous in the underground punk scene in Berlin and that they had also released a second album called _Vampire's Tears_. Slightly inspired by a strange character who seemed to hail from another era, a skin like ivory and red eyes.

-

_February, 1990. USA._

Chenle was blasting _Material Girl_ by Madonna through his cassette player when Jeno approached him. Sicheng and Kun were giving Chenle company. They were in a pretty park with a beautiful garden; Chenle liked fancy and girly things. He was wearing expensive sportswear, white and red, and a bandana on his head. The trio had just finished doing tennis and they were now relaxing, drinking sweet lemonades. A shop near them played _Beat It_ from Michael Jackson and Jeno couldn't stop wondering if Donghyuck would like the singer.

-

_March, 2014. Seoul._

Jeno's apartment was located in a residential poor middle-class area. His neighbors were some shops along the street and other buildings with clothes hanging from the windows. In the late hours of the night there was always music playing from one of the apartments. It was the fifth time in a week that he heard his neighbors' complaints, how they came to the door of the disturber and demanded them to turn down the volume. Jeno listened as the music stopped for a while but then it came back with a quieter melody so as not to disturb the neighbors again. Honestly Jeno didn’t mind the music. Rather, it kept him company in his lonely and sleepless nights.

One day someone knocked on his door at three in the morning, the music from outside faintly echoing through the apartment. Jeno opened the door and found a boy in his twenties with light brown hair and obvious dark circles.

“Are you a doormat or you just don't mind the noise?” It's the first thing Jeno heard Jaemin say.

Jeno was surprised, but then he replied. “So, you're the noisy one.” Jaemin let out a funny giggle.

“You're the only one who doesn't complain about the music in this building.” He told him with a smile on his face. Jaemin inspected his clothes as Jeno wasn't even wearing his pajamas and asked, “Are you going somewhere?"

Jeno shook his head and told him that he suffered from insomnia, and Jaemin laughed again, this time a little louder.

“It seems we are two.”

From that day onward, Jaemin frequented his apartment more. He was an university student with exams approaching each day and the music helped him to study in the ungodly hours of the night. One day, when they were studying history, Jeno let out a dangerous comment with no rational explanation to give about how Marie Antoinette had a red and purple dress that she wore when she took walks in the gardens of Versailles. Jaemin looked at him in a comical way and threw his head back laughing. Jaemin found him funny, a rarity. _Renjun never did._

Jaemin was smart, kind, and stubborn. He had given up on sleeping pills because they only made him laggy and they didn’t let him function as a proper human being in the mornings. Every night he knocked on Jeno's door and they settled in his apartment, usually with Jaemin beginning the conversations —more like— interrogations, though Jeno didn’t care.

One day Jaemin asked something menial and Jeno answered with a lie, stupidly.

“What college do you go to?”

“Uh... A—University.”

“Oh? Seriously. I go to that one too.”

_Fuck._

“You know what? Mr. I Go To College—University. You don’t even go to college.” Jaemin pointed at him. “I think you sell drugs for a living.” He said with a shameless smile on his face.

Jeno was speechless.

“Tell me, what do you sell?” Jaemin insisted. “Can I buy some?” Jeno’s face felt hot.

After the embarrassing situation Jaemin put him in, he managed to end the conversation by convincing him that he was a non-recurring student in one of the universities to which he had just remembered the name of.

Jaemin became a permanent figure in Jeno's life. They both saw each other from 11 p.m. to 5 a.m. each day. Sometimes they went out for night walks and visited grocery stores that are open for 24 hours. That late night morning when the sky was still dark, they were sitting outside a gas station with neon lights, the place in the middle of nowhere looked like a portal to another dimension. Jaemin chewed a pork sandwich while Jeno drank a strange fluorescent yellow soda.

“Oi, Jeno. Birthdays. Do you celebrate them?” Jaemin said.

“Mmm, not really.”

“When is yours?” It was an innocent question, but Jaemin's tone made it look like a test.

“April 23rd.”

“So, you’re older than me? Damn.” _You have no idea_ , Jeno thought. “Mine’s August 13, make sure you don’t forget it.”

Then Jaemin leaned down and tried to kiss his cheek, but Jeno quickly turned away. Jaemin ended up laughing at him and Jeno couldn't take off his eye-smile of his face, embarrassed.

On a full moon night, Jeno felt as if all his world crumbled down when Jaemin asked him that one question.

“Are you a vampire?”

It took Jeno by surprise. He felt his heart tighten and his answer came tighter than he hoped, too.

“No.”

“I knew you wouldn’t admit to it.”

“Maybe because I’m not.”

“Listen, you know I wouldn’t judge you.”

He felt his eyes sting. “I’m not.”

“But if you were— I mean. I know you are.”

“And if I were, I wouldn’t tell you,” said Jeno almost angrily but he couldn’t tell if he was angry at Jaemin or at himself for having being so obvious.

“Look—”

At that moment, Jeno stood up and walked to the bathroom. His head felt light and his heart was beating fast. He felt like he might have a stroke. He washed his face twice and looked at his pale reflection. He looked stricken. He _felt_ stricken. And then he heard a knock on the bathroom’s door.

A few minutes went by before Jaemin spoke. “Jeno.”

“What?”

A silent moment passed and Jeno thought Jaemin wouldn’t speak again, but he did.

“I don’t have a lot of experience with vampires,” said Jaemin, “But I have hunted werewolves. I shot one once.”

Jeno’s laugh came out as a silent sob.

“Thanks.” Jeno spoke almost silently.

He imagined Jaemin smiling at the other side of the door. “Good night, Jeno.”

Jeno refused to look at Jaemin after that. He spent days in the apartament isolated from everything. The mere thought of Jaemin made him feel agitated and anxious. But Jaemin had obviously tried to knock on his door every day and night. When he told Jisung it was by his own choice, but now he felt it wasn’t right for Jaemin to know. He felt violated. He had never thought of telling Donghyuck, let alone Renjun. He shouldn’t and couldn’t.

The door rang and it was Jaemin, of course. Jeno couldn’t simply move a muscle and remained still in the ground, hearing the knocks on the door.

“I’m know you’re there! Until when are you going to ignore me!?” Jaemin screamed. “I have something to tell you.” More door knocks and then silence.

Jeno let out a sigh he was holding.

Maybe in the eighth or ninth attempt in the week, Jeno was already tired of ignoring Jaemin and missing him. This time he got up from the floor and opened the door. Jaemin looked as tired as ever, but a hopeful smile illuminated his face when he saw Jeno, he was leaning against the door’s frame.

“I thought you would never open it.” He said, panting as he was tired of all the knocking.

“What it is, Nana?” Jeno asked, defeated, but he didn't let him in.

“I spend the last days watching vampire movies. I think they’re interesting.” Jeno looked at him with incredulity. “And I learned some things.”  

Jeno grabbed Jaemin to brought him inside the apartament and waited for him to speak.

“I was an asshole. I shouldn’t have pushed you like that.” Jaemin settled in front of Jeno. “I’m sorry.”

“You should have never known.” Jeno said calmly. “No one is supposed to know.”

“I’m not going to tell anyone, Jeno.” Jaemin said.

“That’s not the point!” Jeno exclaimed. “I can never see my friends die, I always leave.”

“Were you planning of leaving?” Jaemin looked so hurt.

Jeno said nothing. He sensed the confession like a shot in the back. It was the reason Jeno was so afraid of. He opened his mouth as for to say something but the words got stuck in his throat. Jaemin looked at him expectantly. It wasn't like Jeno didn't like Jaemin back; he was just scared. Jaemin got closer to Jeno hesitantly, until they were face to face, and Jaemin cupped Jeno's face and mashed their lips together.

-

_May, 2016. Seoul._

Jaemin was laying on Jeno’s bed; he didn't bother going back to his apartment because it was late and he was exhausted. It wasn't uncommon, Jaemin used to spend more time on his bed than Jeno himself. He came closer and sat next to Jaemin’s body.

Jaemin opened his eyes, grabbed Jeno by the arm and pulled him down to make him lay in front of him, incredibly close. He wore a tired smile on his face.

With a glint in his eyes, he whispered. “Your face…” Again. _His face._

But before Jeno could do or say something, Jaemin leaned down and kissed him softly on the lips. Jeno abruptly closed his eyes and remained still until Jaemin cupped his cheek and deepened the kiss, so much that it made Jeno return to his senses and kiss him back. He felt Jaemin’s smile on his lips.

When it was over, Jaemin’s face was so close that he could feel his breath faintly brushing his face. Then his expression turned serious and supplicating. “Make me a vampire.”

Jeno couldn’t believe what he’d heard.  “What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean.” His tone was soft. “I beg you, turn me into one.” Jaemin leaned forward and kissed him again.

Jeno wondered if these were Jaemin's true motives for wanting to turn into a vampire.

By the end of the year, Jaemin's funeral was already planned. Even after all the begging and sobbing, it was inevitable. Jaemin still faltered at the thought his family suffering for his death.

 _“I don't think you should. You would have to leave your family and friends, this isn't worth that.”_ Jeno told him.

But Jaemin was set on the transformation. However, the conversion was going to happen after the fake funeral. It was what he had agreed with Jeno.

The death happened in the fire of a building. They went inside when the building was burning down slowly. Jaemin switched his dental records with a body already incinerated by the fire in the scene. He didn’t back down, not for a second, even when Jeno found the whole scene traumatizing and was on the verge of vomiting. Without suspicions or claims, a coroner confirmed that the burnt body from the building was Jaemin's. The news came quickly to his family and Jeno witnessed his mother's screams upon hearing it.

Next came the funeral. All of Jaemin's loved ones were present. His mother cried the whole evening and Jaemin had tears coming down his face from time to time. Jeno could only held him tight when he would collapse to the ground. At the end of the day, Jaemin told him that there was one relationship which was worth living for, even if embracing it means he had to toss the rest of his life away.

 _Life is velvet and eternity._  Jaemin said to him the day of his conversion, he was feeling cheerful and excited. Jeno was so nervous that his hands trembled. He tried to act as secure as possible. In the first step, Jaemin had to be drained to the very threshold of death. As he heard it, he just nodded and relaxed his body, exposing the thin skin of his neck.

“You must cling to life, Nana. Pay attention to your blood flow, you have to be calm and breathe.” Jeno’s voice was weak, Jaemin held his hand tight and gave him a restoring smile.

While Jeno tried to calm himself down, he leaned forward slowly and brushed him with his lips, then he breathed deeply and sank his teeth into his neck. Jaemin’s body went into a paralysis. Jeno still held him with force; he sunk his teeth with such strength that the two puncture wounds grew enormous and Jeno knew it was causing Jaemin extreme pain. Jeno pulled out his teeth and rested Jaemin’s body still on the sofa and bit his own wrist. When the blood came out, a splash of red drops soaked his clothes. All of it spilled and spreaded on the floor and his face.

He pressed his bleeding wrist to Jaemin’s mouth, words stuttering. “You have to drink it.” And Jaemin drank, sucking the blood out of the wound.

After a couple of minutes, Jeno pulled his wrist free. Jaemin opened his eyes wide like a newborn child and Jeno saw as he turned into a radiant and ethereal creature. The newly vampire smiled at him with delight.

-

_January, 2017. Seoul._

“Stop liking me.” Jeno’s voice echoed in the darkness.

“Why?” He answered with a burlesque tone in his voice.

-

_June, 2018. Spain._

Jeno wandered the streets of Madrid with light steps. It was a night of crescent moon and the city was full of tourists, friends and lovers, walking on both sides of the streets. The lights of the stores blinded Jeno and the noise filled his ears. It was a normal day in the arrival of summer and the city was already crowded with joy and amusement. He didn’t know where Jaemin was; it had been about five months since the last time he saw him. He was as magnetizing and graceful as ever.

At some point in the years apart from Jaemin, he constantly thought of Renjun. He haunted his mind; _he_ was something that wouldn’t leave him alone, even when he felt fatally in love with Jaemin. Jeno wondered if it should have been Renjun who he should have turned into a vampire. He thought about Renjun smiling at him in complicity, giving him a knowing look. About Renjun saying to him:

 _“Even if I’m not here, I’m here, you know?”_ As he waved Jeno goodbye in that ferry.

How Jeno stayed on the port waiting for something to happen, anything; just to return home disappointed with a letter that was left for Renjun.

However, Jeno was still here, waiting for someone else to show up. Jaemin would find him; he always did. Jeno had a strong urge to see him, to talk to him, to hear the soft sound of his voice. He still ached for him, ached for his romantic delusions, even with his new corrupted path. He loved him, plain and simple. There was a handful of darkness inside him now. Jeno could only come to try and take it out of him, but Jaemin always wanted more and he could always get it, he took advantage of his vampiric charms to get anything he wanted. Jeno couldn’t take it, as much as Jaemin wanted him on his side, he wouldn’t cross that line that separated sanity and pleasure.

“Long time no see, _mi amor_.” Jeno heard him from behind.

He was there. Their eyes locked on each other. Jaemin was wearing an elegant black suit and his hair slicked back. “Did you miss me?” He broke the stillness and smiled.

Jeno was caught in a trance. Jaemin broke the distance, reached out and ran his fingers down the lapel of his gray coat. Jeno forgot all the things he had planned to say as Jaemin just took him in his arms. They embraced the way they did in the past. And then he ran his hands over Jeno’s hair and his face. Jaemin slipped his arm around Jeno’s shoulder and they walked together away to one of the main streets. A never-leaving smile on his face. It wasn’t planned but Jeno could only follow Jaemin as he headed him through the way. Maybe just this time it would be fine, to spend time with him. Just for once, again.

Jeno heard a faint sound of music coming out of one of the apartments nearby. A memory hit him. Jeno didn’t feel alone, even if he wasn’t with Jaemin anymore, with the mere thought of him here in this exact moment or in some other part of the world, he knew he had someone. Here. Forever.

A vampire made by him, even if he didn’t belong to him.

**Author's Note:**

> i made a [playlist](https://open.spotify.com/user/seerenam/playlist/0mJdQMRxJSyT2qfboCvPej) for this fic and my [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/ldh)


End file.
